I'm so caffeinated right now that I can physically hear colours, so buckle up for this hyper-speed update!
WE SCREWED UP
So... Turns out the Banana X Tentacle has some... performance issues. It doesn't stand up (awkward), it's not vac u lock compatible, and keeps getting unwanted bubbles. We've temporarily pulled it from the site while our designers work their magic. It'll be back when it's properly... functional.
THE MAW
You all CANNOT get enough of The Maw! Alex has been making moulds like a possessed pottery teacher just to keep up. Even more good news for the Design A Grinder fans among you – our chosen winner, "The Petals" drops Monday 👀
DESIGN-A-DILDO COMPETITION INCOMING
After the wild success of our Design-A-Grinder comp, we're unleashing your creativity again! This time, we want your most imaginative dildo designs. Get those creative juices flowing and start sketching your wildest ideas now – more details coming very soon. Fame and fantasy await!
AWARD NOMINATION: HELP US DEFEAT THE DRAGON
- Our Oni Grinder is nominated for Best Horror Toy! proud parent moment
- We can't lose to Bad Dragon AGAIN! shakes fist dramatically... So ➡️ VOTE FOR US HERE ⬅️
- Get a FREE X-Small Knot this weekend!
- If you're a size queen (or king – is that a thing? Let's make it a thing!), you can size up for a MASSIVE discount
- Ends sometime Monday. There's a timer on the website, but since you're scattered across different time zones, we'll let the website do the math for you.