Your melting Chief Dildo Officer / Dragon Slayer here, coming to you live from what I can only describe as the surface of the sun. We’re currently running on iced coffee, the power of positive thinking, and the knowledge that somewhere, someone is having amazing orgasms thanks to our products.
🌡️ CURRENT SITUATION UPDATE 🌡️
It's 39°C here (that's 102°F for our Fahrenheit friends)...
The dogs have given up and are now alternating between:
Drinking their body weight in water
Slumping on anything remotely cold
Meanwhile, I'm sitting here sweating writing to you about sex toys because apparently this is my life now and honestly?
SPEAKING OF HOT THINGS THAT GET VOTES... (amazing segue)
Our design a dildo competition is going STRONG and the votes are pouring in!
If you haven't voted yet... SHAME. SHAME ON YOU.
But seriously, there are some absolutely incredible dong designs in there and your vote could be the difference between "pretty good dildo" and "life changing pleasure sculpture." No pressure though! (Okay, maybe a little pressure.)
Thank you and goodbye forever!
Your melting Chief Dildo Officer / Dragon Slayer 🫠