Goblin Dildo

Q: What do the colours actually look like?

Check out our colour guide to see exactly what our colours look like. But please keep in mind, each toy is hand-poured, so no two are exactly alike!

Q: What are the different firmness options?

We offer the following firmness options: Medium Firmness - 10A on the Shore hardness scale Super Soft Firmness - 0040 on the Shore hardness scale Squishy Soft Firmness - 0020 on the Shore hardness scale For more information about our firmness options see our firmness guide .

New

£49

Size: X-Small

X-Small Small (+£10) Medium (+£20) Large (+£70)

Total:

£49

Description

Meet your new favourite troublemaker: The Goblin.

This cheeky little creation brings all the mischievous energy you'd expect, complete with ribs, curves, and delightfully bumpy bits that'll have you questioning why you ever settled for boring toys.

What makes this little troublemaker special, I hear you ask from the back?

Realistic meets fantasy curves because why choose between what works and what sparks your imagination?

Curved for pleasure in all the right ways. Think of it as having a built in navigation system for all your favourite spots.

Bumpy underside texture means you'll literally feel every single ridge and curve. Those details aren't just pretty to look at (though they really are something to behold).

The Goblin proves that the best adventures happen when you embrace a little chaos.

Platinum Silicone

We use platinum-cure silicone for every single product because honestly? You deserve toys that are safe, durable, and feel as good as they look.

What makes it so special?

It's non-porous, which means when you clean it, it actually gets clean clean. No sneaky bacteria hiding in microscopic crevices. No weird smells developing over time. Just pure, body-safe silicone that stays hygienic no matter how adventurous you get.

Plus, it feels incredible. Like, genuinely fantastic!

Discreet Shipping

All our toys arrive in the most boring brown boxes imaginable. No logos, no winking emojis, no hints. Just you, your package, and absolutely zero awkward small talk with delivery drivers.

Secure Checkout

We accept credit cards, debit cards, PayPal, ClearPay, Sezzle and Klarna. All secure, all simple, all showing discreetly on your bank statement.

Size Guide (Inches)

Measurement	XS	S	M	L
Head Circumference	3.6 9.1	4.6 11.7	5.3 13.5	6.1 15.5
Head Diameter	1.2 3.0	1.5 3.8	1.7 4.3	2.0 5.1
Knot or Middle Circumference	4.3 10.9	5.5 14.0	6.3 16.0	7.7 19.6
Middle Diameter	1.4 3.6	1.8 4.6	2.0 5.1	2.5 6.4
Shaft Circumference	4.3 10.9	5.5 14.0	6.3 16.0	7.7 19.6
Insertable Length	4.5 11.4	5.9 15.0	6.9 17.5	8.4 21.3
Total Length	5.4 13.7	6.9 17.5	8.3 21.1	9.8 24.9
Base Circumference	8.7 22.1	11.2 28.4	12.8 32.5	15.8 40.1

Product FAQ

What do the colours actually look like?

Check out our colour guide to see exactly what our colours look like. But please keep in mind, each toy is hand-poured, so no two are exactly alike!

How often should I clean my sex toys?

Clean your sex toys after every use! If you forget, just make sure they’re squeaky clean before the next use. However, anal toys need immediate attention due to the higher concentration of bacteria in that area, so wash and dry them ASAP.

What are the different colour options?

We offer 6 different colour styles, though not all are available on every product.

Surprise Me Basic - Leave the decision in our capable hands and we'll choose a solid colour that compliments your toy selection.

Surprise Me Premium - Leave the decision to us and we'll get creative with two or more colours. We love this choice as it allows us to get experimental with all of our colours, often resulting in our best pours.

Solid - One colour that will run evenly throughout your toy

Fade - Two colours combined that are gradually blended together. Colour 1 will be the tip of your toy and Colour 2 will be the shaft and base.

Marble - Two colours combined resulting in a veining effect similar to classic marble.

UC Trademark - This is a product-specific colour. The main image of the product is the UC Trademark colour.

For more information, take a look at our colour guide.

What are the different firmness options?

We offer the following firmness options:

Medium Firmness - 10A on the Shore hardness scale
Super Soft Firmness - 0040 on the Shore hardness scale
Squishy Soft Firmness - 0020 on the Shore hardness scale

For more information about our firmness options see our firmness guide.

Why do you only use platinum silicone?

We use platinum silicone so you get a toy that is non-pourous (meaning when you clean it, it gets fully clean and can't transmit bacteria), doesn't smell, is body safe and feels fantastic.

If you'd like to learn more about cleaning your toys, read our sex toy care guide.