








The Tentacle III Dildo
Thick rather than long, top heavy on purpose, so it leads with the part you actually care about and tapers off politely once it's made its point. If you're worried it's too much, that natural curve does the finding for you (you barely have to aim), and it's premium platinum silicone, body safe and soft enough to forgive while it absolutely refuses to leave. Suckers down the front, gentle ribs down the back, which is a lot of opinions for one tentacle.
Total:
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The Tentacle III.
Thick, not long, and yes that was a decision (a tentacle that's all length is just showing off, this one's here to work). It's top heavy on purpose, sticking its chest out where it counts and getting slimmer on the way down, so it leads with the part you actually care about and tapers off politely after.
The front is suckers, soft ones, running the whole way down. The back is gentle ribs (a little something for the road). Between them you've got that natural tentacle curve doing the thing tentacles do best, which is finding the spot you'd have aimed it at yourself and then point blank refusing to leave.
It sits on a clam shell base, which sounds like set dressing but is genuinely the bit keeping everything stable and planted while you lose the plot entirely. Premium platinum silicone, soft enough to forgive, sturdy enough to mean it.
Designed by the same person behind the Goblin II and Dragon: Scales (@srirachaskrimps), so the pedigree's there. And Matt nailed the trademark colour again, which at this point we've started to take for granted (sorry Matt, we do see you).
A deep sea thing that knows exactly what it's doing. We'll stop describing it now before this turns into a nature documentary.
We use platinum-cure silicone for every single product because honestly? You deserve toys that are safe, durable, and feel as good as they look.
What makes it so special?
It's non-porous, which means when you clean it, it actually gets clean clean. No sneaky bacteria hiding in microscopic crevices. No weird smells developing over time. Just pure, body-safe silicone that stays hygienic no matter how adventurous you get.
Plus, it feels incredible. Like, genuinely fantastic!
Discreet Shipping
All our toys arrive in the most boring brown boxes imaginable. No logos, no winking emojis, no hints. Just you, your package, and absolutely zero awkward small talk with delivery drivers.
Returns
Look, we get it. Sometimes things don't work out. We've all been there.
You've got 30 days from when your package arrives to decide if you want to return something. Just make sure the item is in the same condition you received it — unused, with all its original packaging and tags intact.
For more info here's our full returns policy.
We accept credit cards, debit cards, PayPal, ClearPay, Sezzle and Klarna. All secure, all simple, all showing discreetly on your bank statement.

Soft suckers, gentle ribs
Soft suckers run the whole way down the front while gentle ribs handle the back, and the curve in the middle settles into the spot and then point blank declines to move on.
Planted and steady
It sits on a clam shell base that sounds decorative but is genuinely the bit keeping everything stable and upright while you lose the plot entirely. Comes in X-Small through Large, so the thickness is a choice you get to make.
Forgiving but sturdy
Premium platinum silicone, body safe, soft enough to forgive and sturdy enough to mean it. Nonporous so it wipes down without drama (a deep sea thing that cleans up nicely).
Size Guide (Inches)
| Measurement | XS | S | M | L |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Tip Circumference | 2.0 | 2.8 | 3.1 | 3.5 |
| Head Circumference | 5.1 | 6.9 | 8.3 | 9.4 |
| Head Diameter | 1.6 | 2.2 | 2.6 | 3 |
| Knot or Middle Circumference | 5.9 | 7.3 | 9.3 | 10.4 |
| Middle Diameter | 1.9 | 2.3 | 2.9 | 3.3 |
| Shaft Circumference | 5.2 | 7.1 | 8.3 | 9.3 |
| Insertable Length | 4.2 | 5.5 | 6.7 | 7.7 |
| Total Length | 5.5 | 7.3 | 8.7 | 10 |
| Base Circumference | 8.7 | 11 | 13.2 | 15.2 |
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